20 Things I Learned from 200 Days of Meditation

Some days I’m more focused than others. Meditating at the same time every day is ideal. Self-judgment only makes things worse. How many times I come back to the breath is more important than how many times I linger away. I can go for more than ten minutes without needing to look at my phone.Continue reading “20 Things I Learned from 200 Days of Meditation”

Change in Vision

Once again, I’m dealing with a shift of something I cannot control. My eyes are at the mercy of time and decrease swelling. This last week, I’ve noticed an increase of in double vision. In looking at my phone or reading a book, words split suddenly. This morning, I woke up to a reality hoveringContinue reading “Change in Vision”

healing

breathe in breathe out through the belly close my eyes focus on nothing calm the mind stop overthinking i’m healing my body is doing what it’s supposed to do things are improving round up my distractions they no longer serve me their familiarity isn’t comforting like breathing is in and out in and out distractionsContinue reading “healing”

My Body Remembers

My body remembers feeling the pain. I wasn’t supposed to feel pain. And yet, it’s ingrained in my body. Something went wrong. Nothing’s wrong now. And yet, I’m crying. The fear my body holds is visceral. My brain tries to calm me down. It does not work. I keep crying, I breathe. I panic. IContinue reading “My Body Remembers”

When Time Slowed Down

When I was a child, time moved slowly. I’d go out front and climb the tree that was in our yard. I felt like I was out there for hours when it was probably about thirty minutes. I was present. I wasn’t distracting myself with my own thoughts. I wasn’t worried about what I hadContinue reading “When Time Slowed Down”

My Favorite Books of the Decade!

Dear Reader, This isn’t the usual blog post you’re used to reading every week. I wanted to switch things up a bit for my final blog post of the year (and the decade!). Beneath this note is a list of my 40 favorite books I’ve read in the last decade! The organization of the listContinue reading “My Favorite Books of the Decade!”

Disappeared

It’s clear to me that seasons no longer exist. They only exist as dates on a calendar, marking the passage of time. The rest has faded away to a time and place the planet no longer knows. We’ve had at least five major snow storms in the last two months. It’s autumn, where leaves areContinue reading “Disappeared”

Quiet Vignettes from Yesterday

I woke up thinking the time on my phone had automatically switched forward. It had not. I spent the first hour or two of my day thinking it was a different time. Fortunately, I realized my phone’s problem when I looked at the time on my computer. Unfortunately, the medication I had meant to takeContinue reading “Quiet Vignettes from Yesterday”

Important Note

Unexpected events can often spark the flight or fight response. Overwhelming thoughts that presentthe worst to the extremecome barging into your head when the universetakes you down a road withoutgiving you a heads up before the decision is made.In those moments, the only thing you can control is how you react to those shifts.I’ve always been someoneContinue reading “Important Note”

Fighting the Urge of Phone Addiction

Awareness of a technology addiction is one thing. Trying to change habits that are so ingrained in your psyche is a whole other beast. I’ve known for years now how dependent I am on technology. I’ve joked about it with family and friends. Joking about it makes it not real. Joking about it makes itContinue reading “Fighting the Urge of Phone Addiction”