Comfort

I find comfort in writing. It used to be the opposite. I used to be scared to write things down. Because writing things down makes them real. But now I have found there’s a comfort in placing my thoughts down on the page instead of having them consume my brain. If I can let go of my feelings in a creative way, I can process these moments of fear with calm and levity. I can make a cup of tea, write down what I want to say, some of it appears here, some never see the light of day. Writing in moments like these have made me see the light with writing things as they happen instead of writing a reflection. The feelings are different now than they would be writing from memory. Honesty comes from mindfulness which stems from an awareness of understanding what’s happening. It’s difficult to be real and honest when what’s happening isn’t familiar. Coping mechanisms such as avoidance and distractions don’t last when awareness seeps through everything I do. The more I write, the more I let my feelings out, the better perspective I have on everything. I used to fear writing about things in the moment. Now I find comfort in placing my thoughts down on the page then walking away.