It feels like her brain constantly resets.
That's the best way I can understand it.
To watch the ones you love become
different people is disheartening.
It's the disease they have that causes
them to revert to children or toddlers
depending on how bad it is.
You love them but it's difficult to watch.
It's difficult to hear them repeat themselves
and wonder who they are and why they're here.
It's like their brain has returned to factory settings,
only remember the bare minimum
when it comes to those they love
because it's stored in the cloud of their brain,
which will eventually fade away.
It’s clear to me that seasons no longer exist. They only exist as dates on a calendar, marking the passage of time. The rest has faded away to a time and place the planet no longer knows. We’ve had at least five major snow storms in the last two months. It’s autumn, where leaves are supposed to be falling. Normally, snow begins around the middle of November. But this year, expectations for normalcy have disappeared. We’re left with feet of snow as colored leaves dangle from frozen trees.
You choose to look at the dead field instead of the green grass.
The cliché phrase is true, you know?
The grass is greener on the other side.
Someone may tell you to look at the field.
The green one, not the one with no life.
You won't look at it until someone tells you.
But then you look at it and tilt your head.
Looking at something another way can bring change.
The goal shouldn't be to get to the other side.
The goal should be acknowledging it exists first.
Then you can slowly begin to make your way.
It's about the journey, not the destination.
It's another cliché phrase that fits.
We all have things we can look at differently.
It could be something we have no control over.
Or it could be something that you can change.
Whatever it is that's filling you with shame or denial,
Only you can be the one to decide it's time to change.
No more pretending like it doesn't exist or walking around it.
You can control your thinking.
Will you choose to look at the green grass?
Or will you continue to keep your head in the dirt?
The intention of the message is lost,
causing both sides to bicker and banter.
Perspective impacts opinion and causes
emotions to cloud one's judgment.
Person one says something to person two.
Person two takes what person one said to heart
and accuses person one of meaning something
they didn't because the communication wasn't clear.
This causes both parties to escalate their stances,
which leads to getting outside parties involved
because the communication is seemingly too messy
for either party to resolve the issue on their own.
Outsiders don't know the full story,
and often their biases show
who they're for and who they're against
within moments of hearing one perspective.
It's a case of misunderstanding,
when someone's been hurt too many times,
they can't speak without pain being present,
which causes nothing to be solved.
I don't have to agree with you to respect you.
You don't have to agree with me to respect me.
We can come from two different backgrounds and generations,
have different perspectives, beliefs, and ideas,
and still, be respectful of one another.
The focus is often on what is different about us,
who we love, what we believe, where we live.
While we may have moral differences that define us,
that doesn't mean we can't be kind, or at least civil.
We can get our messages across without yelling at each other.
It's possible to agree to disagree and not be hateful.
Call out injustices that need to be addressed,
make noise when something needs to be changed.
But don't be rude to someone who doesn't agree with you
and don't try to put your beliefs on them.
The goal shouldn't be to get someone
to believe what you believe because it doesn't work.
Repetitive behavior with the same speech
isn't productive or convincing.
It's to be kind to each other regardless of where we stand.
I'm not the bad guy and neither are you.
Before I had the language
to understand and articulate,
I just had the feeling.
I was twelve,
sitting in my sixth-grade classroom,
looking down at what I had written.
These words seem to have come out of nowhere,
I looked around the room
and realized no one could tell
how I was feeling.
I didn't know anything about poetry
and yet, I had written a poem.
It was about how life is like a game
and you just have to go along
with the surprises you encounter.
I read the poem over and over again,
amazed I was capable of writing something so quickly.
Now I have the language,
to share and articulate
what I was feeling.
When I know I've written something
good that's worth sharing,
I experience that feeling.
My stomach fills with butterflies,
the hair on my arm stands straight up.
I'm reminded why I love writing
and why I must take the ideas that come to me
to express what I'm feeling.
Life is like a game
everywhere you look is a surprise.
I didn't know when I wrote these words
what I was feeling
or that I would become a writer.
I just knew when those two lines popped into my brain,
I had to write them down as quickly as I could,
before they could escape.
I watch the snowfall for a third time this month.
I can't remember the last time it snowed
three times before Halloween.
But here I am, watching it float down once more.
It stopped snowing in late May,
only to return in early October.
Is this just a weird year?
The new normal?
A sign of how climate change has impacted the weather?
All of the above?
Winter over stayed it's welcome,
and arrived just as the leaves were turning colorful.
While I appreciate the snow
when it doesn't stick to the roads,
I'll be curious to know
how these shifts will impact future generations.