happy place

For two days, I disconnect
from my reality. Time moves
slowly. I trace the sun across
the cloudless sky, rising up
on one side of the horizon 
then falling below
the other. 
I read my book,
write poems in my journal,
and only grab my phone
to capture this 
beautiful view.
For the first time
in years, I allow my skin
to soak up the sun
without hesitation 
or worry.
I breathe in 
the fresh air,
nap on the dock,
and gab all day
with my aunt about
anything and everything
while my uncle sits
in his chair reading
a book from the library.
We go for boat rides,
play marble games,
and start a puzzle.
We go for morning walks,
drink wine at 2 PM
cause it's 12 o'clock somewhere,
and float the day away.
Summertime bliss, feeling
like a weekend during
the week. A much-needed
getaway

Each Step

I walk by the ocean and 
breathe in the salt air. 
I can breathe easy here. 
I can walk for miles 
on roads and sand 
without hesitation. 
My body gets stronger 
with each step I take. 
I am not dragged down 
by the lack of oxygen. 
This is how I show 
myself love. 
This is how I heal.

Chain Reaction

“Nothing behind me, everything ahead of me, as is ever so on the road.” 
― Jack Kerouac

Driving across the country, I admire
the different shades of green and
welcome the warm weather.
I follow cars and trucks
along state lines, over the
border to another country.
I learn to pay attention
to different speeds
I never used before.
The days blend together
on the road, as I drive
to the next chapter
of my life,
the possibilities
await me.

Facing the Strange

I face all the scary 
strange feelings of this moment. 
I don’t shy away from feeling 
all my fears, 
all my joy,
all my excitement 
and anxiety 
that comes along 
with stepping into something new
and unknown. 
I breathe through panic 
and distraction. 
I am present 
and focused on the now. 
I remind myself to remain grateful.
I don’t jump to the future right away, 
for I’m not living there yet. 
I am here, 
now.

Four Boxes

What is kept contains
memories I don't want
to ever forget.
The innocence of my childhood,
the fears of my teenager years,
the searching of my twenties,
wrapped up in these items
I place in boxes.
Some I will take with me,
most I will leave here.
The things I donate or
throw away aren't worth
remembering.
Sometimes it feels good
to let go of the past,
leave it there and
start anew.

2 AM

silence enters the night 
I do not speak 
I listen to a book 
and work on a puzzle
I lose track of time 
trying to fit pieces together 
slowly the image begins 
to form the harder I focus
rain falls outside
may showers continue
I can slightly hear
the drops hitting
the roof
the narrator details
the tragic backstory
of the protagonist
I pick up a piece
and try not to cry

Partners

For my sister and brother-in-law

Marriage is the daily commitment
You make to each other
To navigate this life together.
It’s a conscious choice
You will continue to make.
Your job isn’t to complete the other,
It’s to complement each other.
You bring your own unique perspectives
Into this relationship.
You won’t always agree.
The goal isn’t to be right
It’s understanding each other
To communicate with openness and honesty
It takes vulnerability and compromise
To build a solid partnership.
You may not always like each other,
But you should always love one another
And remember why you chose to
Live life together.

Journaling

May 1st, 2023 Monday

The start of a new month. 
The grass is finally green, 
the gray skies move away, 
not a cloud in the sky today. 
I sit on the couch as I write out 
this journal entry. I should journal more. 
I know. I miss it. 
And yet, I don't write enough. 
Why? 
Hours blend together. 
The routine of day to day life. 
Work. 
Anxiety. 
Writing for work. 
Anticipating change. 
Exhaustion. 
Journaling had fallen off 
my routine long ago. 
Empty notebooks sit on my desk.
I go weeks without writing anything for me. 
The last notebook was all over the place 
I stopped writing two thirds of the way through. 
A reflection of my mental state. 
I flip through old notebooks 
and miss this part of myself. 
I miss writing the way I used to.

Thoughts From Sunday

Poems of love
Fill my head
Lines I write
Keep a list
On my phone
Tired at night
Long days work
Glass of wine
Red of course
Calming down from
The white lights
Hours a day
Ready for bed
Linger by fire
Write this poem
Thoughts from Sunday
Shared on Monday
I promise myself
I will try
To be kind
To myself when
Things are difficult
I am human
I am trying
Poems of love
Fill my head
Cozy in bed