Kelly Severseike

What I’ve Been Clicking On – Part 1

Happy Saturday!

Here’s what I’ve been clicking on the Internet this week. Most weeks will likely just be a numbered list with link but who knows. I’m still trying to figure this out.

I hope you’re healthy and well.

Kelly

—

Fully Vaccinated, What Now?

Tomorrow marks two weeks since I had my second dose of the Pfizer vaccine. While I’m excited to be less worried about COVID, I’m still nervous. I don’t foresee my life looking remarkably different, at least at first. Though, I do plan on going into stores instead of shopping online and making appointments in-person instead of virtually if I can.

I want to go walk around a library and maybe a bookstore without being determined to leave even before I enter the building. I want to be able to see friends and family who have been fully vaccinated without worrying afterward if there could be a chance of one of us having it or spreading it to everyone else. I do hope COVID will no longer be top of mind before I experience something. I’m hoping I will be able to shed some of the worries I’ve been carrying with me for the last year.

Lately, I’ve been reflecting on where I was this time last year. I was having a lot of panic attacks. I was at the peak of my anxiety threshold with what was out of my control externally. Internally, I tried to avoid and withdraw from my overwhelming thoughts by watching a lot of TV shows and movies. Sometimes, it worked, sometimes it didn’t. I found myself doing a dance with distractions to mentally get through everything while staying physically healthy.

I think myself in May of 2020 couldn’t imagine this is where I would be today. Fully vaccinated to help fight against COVID. Masks were just beginning to become normalized this time last year. Vaccines weren’t in the public consciousness. Myself in May of 2020 would be surprised to hear I didn’t have a panic attack thinking about the vaccine. She would be surprised to hear I haven’t had a major panic attack since last spring.

I’m excited to do some traveling this summer and stay in places that are totally different than what I have experienced this last year. I’m excited to become more comfortable being out in public again. I’m excited to see those who I love and miss dearly. I’m excited to live in the present moment without thinking about what has been or what will be.

even when we can’t control the situation around us, we always can choose where we’re directing our attention.
Liz Stanley, PHD

Happy

Adjective.
The feeling when you can't stop smiling.
Where everything becomes lighter
and you run around the house shaking
and yelling because of unexpected
good news. The feeling of magic,
keeping a secret to process yourself
only leaves you giddier. Feeling like
you can explode from joy at any moment.
Being reassured that the path you're on
is where you're meant to be.

Little Update

Hello Readers!

I have some news. Starting next week, I will be posting two extra days on my blog! I’m trying something new in May. On Fridays, I will be sharing a little paragraph or two about something that’s been on my mind recently. On Saturdays, I will be sharing ten links to things on the Internet that have caught my attention that I want to share.

I love posting on my blog every week and I want to share more than just my poems with you all. If you read them, I will continue this posting schedule.

See you next week!

Kelly

Seasons of April

The month begins with beautiful weather.
Sunshine for days and a warm breeze
that's welcoming after the cold months.

A dramatic turn is taken with
the arrival of a winter storm.
Spring receives winter 
storm warnings. 

Snow falls to the earth,
sometimes like rain,
melting as soon as
it hits the warm sidewalk.
Other times,
they're too fast,
falling in rapid 
succession,
multiplying in inches
within hours of arriving.

The storm passes
and the beautiful
weather returns
once more.

The grass is growing green,
flowers are slowly blooming.
Vibrant colors welcome
nature back to life after
months of remaining dormant.

The cycle between winter and spring
happens several times throughout
the month, allowing no time to
adjust to either season. All this back
and forth eventually causes me
to ignore the weather app
on my phone until June.

Unexpected Stop

I was driving down
a side road,
surrounded
by pine trees.
For some reason,
this road
reminded me of
girl scout camp
when I was younger.
It must have
been all of
the pine trees
and the way
the sun hit
my eyes
behind
my sunglasses.

I was a mile
down the road,
surrounded
by pine trees,
when I had to stop.
Four deer were crossing
the road
then jumping
gracefully
over a low fence
on the other side.

I was amazed at
how they moved,
swiftly without hustle,
elegant but aware.
I was about to move
when a fifth deer
came sprinting across
the road,
trying to keep up
with it's friends.
I laughed. 

No other cars
to be found
on the road
in the middle
of nowhere.
When I got to
the main road
there was a sign
pointing north
and south.
The two directions
I could go.

I chose north
and thought of
the deer
moving in
the same direction
magestically amongst
the pine trees.

Mikey’s Wild Night

Mikey was so obsessed with going outside
that he snuck out into the night
when the door was cracked
and no one was watching. 
Poor little old guy got stuck outside,
pacing back and forth in the newly
fallen snow on the porch.
His meows woke up the sleeping dog upstairs
but the dog didn't act urgent enough to alert
his humans that his friend was outside.
I imagine Mikey befriending mice and
huddling under the porch for warmth,
wondering when someone would notice
he was missing, regretting sneaking out
when no one was watching.
In the morning, he was found and cuddled
profusely by his humans.
Days after his wild night,
he got an eye infection and mopped around,
unlike his usual self, trying to fight off
one of the worst nights he's ever had.

hope

Last year at this time, uncertainty lingered heavy.
There were too many unknowns, with people getting sick

and many dying, no one knew what was going on.
Wearing masks was a figment of an idea, nowhere

near mandatory, people were stuck in their homes,
too stressed to pick up their dog's poop on their walks,

losing their jobs or adjusting to working from home,
downloading an application called Zoom.

A year later, people are getting vaccinated.
COVID cases are still high, but there's hope.

Masks have become common place in most places
in the country, adjustments are being made

to allow for a semblency of normalcy
to return, sports have crowds socially

distanced, a word that has allowed
people to move safely in public spaces

for the last year. I got my first shot
on Saturday. Was I anxious? Absolutely.

Was it what I was worried about? Not at all.
It was a seemless process and while I felt

some mild effects aftwards, it wasn't
terrible. It will allow me to move about

life with some reassurance of safety.
I will be careful and still wear a mask.

Last year at this time, I was the 
definition of anxious and panic.

This year, I have hope.
Hope for a brighter future.

Night Sounds

The train blares
its horn as
it travels by.
I hear it
throughout
the night.

The pipes screech
when I turn off
the water.

Chocolate bubbles
on the stove.

The container pops
when I secure the top.

The dishwasher
whistles
at the
beginning
of its cycle.

The pages of
a library
book rustle
together
as I begin
a new story.

I sneeze loudly
in a quiet room.

Loop Around The Sun

I watched a white plane
loop around the sun,
cross the crescent moon
one sunny afternoon.
The fallen snow
from days before
caught my attention.
I looked away then
looked back only to
see it had vanished,
fading into the soft
blue sky slowly then
all at once.
It looped back time
and time again,
I tried my best
to watch it,
only to have it
disappear in a
different
direction.